Telephones

"In 1876 an old boy named Bell, invented a contraption that we know so well  - by the 1950's it was in every body's home - it's a crazy little thing we call the telephone....." ( thank you Reba...applause applause...)

The first telephone I remember having as a child was a big clunky black thing that weighed about 15 pounds. And it was a ROTARY phone. Like - ehm - you had to dial it and everything. That means you had to like ehm - put your finger in the little slot thingie and rotate the little thingie and then let go and let it go back where it started and then ....you get the idea right? The phone numbers started with a name like I distinctly remember my Grandparents phone number  - it was Colfax 2-5555. ( not really. The Colfax 2 part is true though). That meant you were to dial CO2-5555. Which meant you had to LOOK at the dial. Find the C - (3) and the O (6) and then keep dialing. Whew. What a load of work. Just to call someone. Geeeeeeze.
And then - you had a conversation with whomever you were calling - in like - ehm. . . private. And you kept your voice down because well - you were on the PHONE. And when you called you said " may I speak with so and so please?" and the person on the other end said " why certainly. Hold on please...." and then so and so came to the phone and that was that.

What happened to those days? Now - people walk around with little thingies hanging out of their ears because they are SO blasted important they couldn't possibly miss a phone call. ESPECIALLY not in PUBLIC. Because - after all - we all need to HEAR all about so and so's weekend, and what's his faces latest stint in the clink- and to H- E- double toothpicks with private conversations. And mercy - don't actually work to get connected - just push a little button and yell "call who's his what's it" and ZOINK you're connected.

I say all that to say this: I detest people who talk on their cell phones in public places. I think it's rude. I think no one cares about you're boo, or your kid or your financial problems or your baby daddy or your anything else. Want to know WHY no one cares? Here's why:

WE DON'T KNOW YOU. Therefor we are not amused - or impressed. Stop it.

please.